A Maddening Addiction
by Nao-Beast
Summary: Harry is bored with life , with voldemort gone what has he left to do ? He can't stop think about HIM Draco and its driving him crazy ... Not to metion problems with ron and hermoine . His life has just gone down the drain.Drarry and some Rarry and Snupin
1. Chapter 1

~Chapter 1~

_'I am confused. No, not only confused I'm also addicted. Voldemort is dead and I am the cause of that, merely a killer labeled "Hero". I feel like I am caught in a strong daze, almost like a sleepwalker, stumbling around Hogwarts. Hearing Ron and Hermione babble like theirs nothing but goodness in the world. They're wrong there will never only be goodness its against human nature. We're cruel creatures, every last one of us._

_I'm staring again; we're in the great hall at dinner, and even during study I stare at him but he never notices. I notice everything, like how much taller he got and how long his hair got so beautiful and golden-silver. I notice how it falls right below his wide shoulders and how his mercury eyes still held the same mischievous glow from first year. He mellowed out a lot since Voldemort died, though he still hates me. It seems I will never-'_

"**Harry**?" I was ripped away from my obsessing and was looking at Hermione, her mousy brown hair pulled up in a high ponytail and her eyes filled with worry.

"**What**?" I asked. The monotoneness of my voice was obvious. I lost my emotions after the last fight, where I killed half of myself. Now I just wanted to go back to my obsessing.

"**Are you feeling okay**?" Her voice sickened me how mother hen like it was. The worry so easily heard in her tone that it made Ron look up from shoveling food into his mouth. His red hair was messy and falling in his eyes like usual.

" **Yeah, why**? " The fake smile I always had on now faltered slightly; was she on to me? Did she know? I drank some of my apple cider.

"**You haven't touched any of your food**," she breathed, her eyes softening at me. Ron looked at my plate, full of food I like. I just … I had no interest in eating any of it.

" **Not Hungry**." I muttered and looked to the side, noticing Ginny was out again. Was she still sick? She had been sick a lot lately.

"**You haven't been hungry in a few days bu**-," Ron started to speak but I didn't care. I began to zone back onto my addiction.

_'He was arguing with Blaise, and it looked like he was losing. As Crabbe and Goyle were shoving cupcakes into their mouths not at all concerned with the others arguing? I wonder what they were arguing about. He looked aggravated and annoyed because he was running his fingers through his long bangs. His fine lips were pulled into an indecent scowl; it didn't suite the Slytherine, Let alone a seventh year…'_

"**You're staring at that serpent again**!" I snapped my head towards Ron who was looking mad at me. Hermione just watch me with wide eyes.

"**Was not**," I growled defensively.

"**Yes you were Harry. You are sick.**" Ron's voice rose in anger. He seemed angry and worried about me being sick. It was probably because Ginny had been so sick all the time. Luna and Neville turned and looked at us, utterly confused.

"**Harry, let's go see Madam Pomfey**," Hermione stated sweetly as she met my dull eyes with her gentle loving ones.

"**WHY**!" I snapped and jumped up from the table. The whole hall became eerily silent. I didn't care. I didn't even care that everyone was staring at me with fearful eyes. " **I'M FINE! I DON'T NEED TO GO SEE THAT OLD BAT**!" I yelled at her and Ron got up and looked down at me, narrowing his eyes and getting protective of the witch.

"**Harry calm down**," he stated and reached out to touch me. I slapped his hand away and the crack echoed through the hall. " **NO**!" I yelped. " **JUST LEAVE ME ALONE**!" My voice sounded like a fearful kitten.

My legs acted on their own and I turned and ran away. Ron chased after me with Hermione not far behind him, calling me begging for me to stop.

I don't know when I lost them but I was now alone, well not technically. I looked up at the ghost girl who was starring at me, no, was gawking at me. Tears stained my cheeks already.

"**WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT**!" I yelled at her, causing her to cry and hide in her toilet.

I stopped when I caught a glimpse of my reflection. I turned my eyes away from the pale sickly looking Harry Potter in the mirror, tears falling harder and faster out of my already stinging eyes.

_' What was wrong with me? I snapped at my friends, who were only trying to help. I hit Ron, the male who had been there for me since the start of everything. I haven't even had an appetite in days. Now I yelled at a poor dead girl! I was a monster. Was I going mad?'_ My heart stopped. I was going crazy wasn't I?

I grasped my head in my hands as I cried, screaming and thrashing. I let out all my anguish, All of the desire and all of the hate I had trapped in my body. I had cast a spell so that no sounds could be heard coming from this room.

I didn't know how long I had been sitting in the middle of the bathroom staring at the mirrors I broke. There would be so much bad luck but all I could think of was how crazy I looked in the shards that remained of the mirror.

Footsteps brought me out of my daze, getting closer and closer. I ran and hid in the first stall I saw, sitting up on the closed toilette lid, pulling up my knees and hugged them, and hiding my face. I needed to get out of Hogwarts!

"**The monster's in there**!" I heard the moaning depressed voice of Myrtle.

I knew they'd find me eventually but not this soon; Well, I really wasn't sure how long I had been in here. I just didn't want to be found; I didn't want anyone to see me like this; so.. so ... broken. I started to cry again.

The stall creaked open and I just hugged my knees tighter. " **Leave me alone**, " I whimpered out, not daring to look.

" I** can't do that potter ,or we'd never be able to study again." **a voice, so velvety and intoxicating filled my ears. My heart stopped as I slowly looked up into the mercury eyes that haunted my dreams, and a wand I would recognize anywhere pointed at my face.

Draco...

**DONT FORGET TO COMMENT!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: HERES CHAPT 2**

**~Chapter 2 ~**

I stared up at Draco Malfoy. What did he mean? Not being able to study if he left me alone, I blinked up at him.

He sighed and lowered his wand. " **You don't understand do you**?" He asked.

I opened my mouth to retort but nothing came out. I was so confused.

"**You've been missing for two days Potter**." He stated in a cold , matter of fact tone.

_'Two days! But no…I had only been here a few hours! Or was I really gone for that long? I don't remember, too much crying and thinking…'_

"**Your Mud- blood friend went to Snape and Dumbledore ; they're making all the seventh years look for you**," He added, running his wandless hand through his hair. "**Now get up and come with me,**" He finished sharply, narrowing those lovely eyes at me.

"**No**," I rasped out, narrowing my dead eyes at him.

" **Potter if you don't come willingly I will stupefy you**," He growled seriously.

I sighed and stood up slowly , stepping forward as he backed up so we were now out of the stall . I looked up at him noticing how he was taller then Ron now seven inches taller then me…

"**Malfoy**..." I found myself whispering his sir name as I stopped in my tracks.

_'Why should I go back with him? Just to go back to the way things were before? Staring from afar, feeling my heart break every time he talked to Pansy. I only wanted Draco in my life, no one else, just him.'_

He scowled at me when I stopped. It looked so wrong on that beautiful face of his. "**What**?" He hissed at me.

"**Do you hate me**?" I asked letting my face fall into the mask of nothingness as I waited for an answer I knew I wouldn't like. I looked to the side at the giant stain glassed window that I always loved.

"**Potter, have you gone mad**?" He asked and smirked. "**And yes I hate any stupid Gryffindor who hangs with mud-bloods**" He stated coldly. My heart shattered into tinier pieces. I just kept staring at that window.

My mind started to come up with a solution in depression. I looked up at him and reached up doing something I never thought I'd do. I pressed my lips against his cold ones for a brief second before he shoved me away hard.

"**What the hell, Potter**!" He yelped and wiped his mouth. As tears slid down my face, I turned and ran, my glasses falling as I went . He didn't want me. He pushed me away, I wasn't wanted. I wasn't wanted!

I heard moaning myrtle shriek as I went through the window, glass shattering and ripping my uniform to reveal skin. The cold stung my eyes as I began to fall, but I didn't care.

"**HARRY**!" His beautiful voice was full of shock and panic as it hit my ears while I fell. A blinding blue light enveloped me right as I hit the cold, frozen snow bank.

I_ opened my eyes and there was nothing just a bottomless black ocean. I was laying there, not knowing where I was, not really caring either. I raised up my hand to touch my face, see if I was truly here. I blinked; I could see it clearly, even in this darkness. I looked down at my body and blushed deeply; I could see every curve and scar on my bare body. The funny thing was I wasn't cold, in fact I was so contently warm, and there were no pains here . Was this heaven? I didn't know, but it was just so peaceful and calm. I shut my eyes and listened to the lovely silence._

_Then I heard muffles that slowly became more and more understandable._

"**Why would Harry do this**?" I heard Hermione's pained sobbing.

"Harry was unhappy" Luna's meek voice sounded closer than Hermione.

"**This is your fault**!" Ron sounded so mad and weird. He sounded like shoving or someone hitting something.

"_**My **_**fault! How was **_**I **_**supposed to know he was suicidal**!" My love, my obsession. I hate hearing you snap at my friends. I wonder if you know that?

"**Keep your voices down**!" Madame Pomfey whispered in a sharp hiss.

_Wait, if I could hear what was going on , then I wasn't dead. For some reason I felt saddened by this fact._

**A/N: I think the redoes are better then the original … lol COMMENT PLEASE**


	3. Chapter 3

**~Chapter 3~**

The room went scary quiet after Madam Pomfey's hiss. The only sound that came was a door opening, the footsteps echoeing.

**"So, what happened? Will he be okay?" **I felt my heat ache at Dumbledore's concerned voice.

**" He's just sleeping. He should be fine,"** Pomfey breathed and I felt some one touch my hand.

**" His hand is so cold," **I heard Luna whisper. **" Wonder what he's dreaming about," **she added. I loved Luna; she was so sweet and innocent.

I heard a scoff. **" Draco, explain what happened before Lovegood starts speaking again." **I recognized that mean snappy voice; Snape. Why the heck was he here?

**" Severus be nice."** I blinked in my darkness. Remus? Why was he using such a gentle tone with Snape? **" But please, Mr. Malfoy, explain." **The man finished.

**" Yes sir."** I heard Draco sigh.** " Well, I went into the abandoned bathroom, searching for Ha-Potter." **I blinked he almost said my first name. Then I remembered he yelled my first name when I was falling. **" The bathroom was torn apart, all the mirrors shattered and glass everywhere. Moaning Myrtle was wailing about a monster in her stall. So I looked in and there was Potter, crying. He kept telling me to leave him alone, so I threatened to stupefy him, he started to follow then stopped." **I could picture him running his fingers through his hair. **" The next thing I knew the ghost was wailing and Harry threw himself through the window. I used a charm to make him land softer but that's all I could really do." **So that was the blue light? Wait! He didn't tell them. What I asked him, what I did to him. The kiss…

**" Is that all that happened?"** Dumbledore's voice sounded sympathetic.

**"Yes" **I heard him lie, sounding sincere.

**" We'll have to ask Potter about why he did this when he wakes,"** Remus stated and I heard heel toed boots coming towards me.

**"Why don't we just wake him now?"** Snape's voice was so close and dark, but it sounded nicer than usual… it was kind of creepy.

**"Just leave him alone,"** Ron growled defensively.

The room fell silent again. It gave me chills how much tension was in this room. He wondered what happened to make Ron get so defensive.

**" Weasley, you shouldn't talk to professors like that." **I heard Draco's voice; only it sounded distant and emotionless.

**" No its fine Draco**." Dumbledore had that stupid sympathetic tone again. "** He's right. We should leave and let him rest." **I swore I could hear Ron smirking at Draco.

The footsteps started to leave and I shut my eyes in the darkness.

**"Draco, lets go." **Snape's voice sounded gentler almost as if he were pitying someone.

I snapped my eyes open. I didn't want Draco to leave! I winced at how bright everything got. Wasn't it all just dark before?

**" Harry!"** Luna's vice sounded excited. **" How was your dreaming?"** She asked and the footsteps stopped.

I stared blankly at her. Noticing how for once she didn't have her golden curls pulled back in a low ponytail and how they fell angelically around her face.

**"Harry…"** I turned my head towards Ron, then pain shot through my cheek as he hit me. The pain from the hit triggered all the rest of the pain that was numb before. **" Why the hell did you do that?"** he growled grabbing my shirt and shaking me while tears fell from his hurt eyes. My chest ached, as Remus and Hermione ripped him from me.

I felt my own tears forming again.

**" I'll go get you some pain medicine, "** Madam Pomfey breathed as Ron was dragged out of the room, leaving me with Snape, Dumbledore, Luna, and Draco.

**" I'm sorry Harry, Ron's just upset."** I just let my hair cover my eyes as Luna defended Ron.

**"Harry, would you tell us why you jumped?"** Dumbledore came closer speaking softly as if I was a baby.

I just let my tears fall and Luna squeezed my limp hand.

_' Why did she care so much? Why did they all care so much? I already killed Voldemort so I had no purpose.'_

**" Potter, are you going to answer or not?" **I glanced at Snape who froze seeing my tears, and possibly at how dead my eyes were, how hollow I felt.

I didn't dare look at Draco, afraid to look at him, for the pain would become even more unbearable.

**" Harry?" **Luna's voice sickened me. She sounded so worried as I took my hand from hers.

I needed to sever my ties with everyone. I couldn't stand all this stupid worrying and pitying.

**" Here, deary, take this; you'll feel better."** I glared at the woman; slapping the potion away and hearing the glass shatter on the ground as the others came back in. Ron's eyes were red, but they looked sorry; it made me angry.

_' He didn't want me.' _That was the only thing repeating in my head and how he pushed me away.

**" Why don't any of you get it?" **I yelled tears, blinding me. **" I was trying to kill myself! I want to die! "** The room fell deadly silent. All eyes were on me, shocked as I brought my hands up to cover my eyes in an attempt to return to my dark haven.

A/N: COMMENTS? pwease 0.0


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Comment Please?**

Waking from his haze of sedatives, Harry opened his eyes. It was still too harry a dose though, so he was frozen despite his consciousness. No sound came from his throat. The best he could was gaze about the room. To his left, a strange figure caught his eye.

Draco Malfoy. He was sitting right next to harry on a chair. Disheveled long hair carelessly thrown into a low ponytail, his shirt half unbuttoned and tie loose, and his pale eyes shining in concentration as he continued his homework: it was so beautiful. What bothered Harry the most was the thin wire glasses blocking his view of those gorgeous eyes? He was so deep in thought he didn't even notice he was no longer writing on the parchment, but rather, the table beside him. Harry wanted to laugh, but he couldn't.

A sound made him shift his eyes towards the door. It had opened and closed without human contact, or rather without visible human contact, because upon entry a figure began to appear from thin air, Ron had taken Harry invisibity cloak. His look of genuine concern sickened him. All he could do was watch as the scene unfolded before him.

Ron's face screwed up in anger and it happened so fast, he didn't even have time to be surprised. Draco's nose was spewing blood, and Ron rubbed his fist, glaring at Draco with so much insanity, it scared Harry.

**"You done, Weasley?"** Draco's cool voice was as superior as ever.

He nodded in defeat and walked over to Harry's bed while Harry had closed his eyes. Harry wondered why Ron didn't question Draco's presence.

With a tear rolling down his cheek, Ron muttered, "I'm sorry Harry." Sorry? What the heck for? Harry didn't know what it could have been he was apologizing for, but he couldn't ask. Ron turned and covered himself with the cloak once more and retreated from the room.

****************** I AM A BREAK ************************************************

Snape sat up in bed the black sheets of his king sized bed falling loose around him. The man turned the page in the book he was reading. The candle light flickered as the bedroom door opened.

Remus walked into the room shirtless and only wearing a pair of baggy pajama pants.

**"I got tea maybe it will help us calm down," **The bigger man breathed, causing Snape to mark the page in the book and shut it setting it aside.

**"I don't understand that boy's logic Remus."** Snape's voice wasn't cold for once; it was actually quite soft and timid as he took the tea from the sitting werewolf.

**"Snape, Dear just don't think about it tonight you need to rest." **Remus spoke softly calmly to the Potions teacher.

Snape just sighed, looking at his tea. It wasn't long after Remus lifted Snape's cup away and set it on the table beside the bed.

**"Look at me, Severus. He'll be fine. We'll do whatever we can for him,"** Snape's eyes never left Remus's as he spoke to the man practically over top of him.

Soon their lips met in a sweet innocent kiss; something that comforted the usually cruel teacher.

************************BREAK**********************************************

Another hour or so passed and no more surprise guests came. Draco was still there however, his nose stopped bleeding but he made no motion to fix the break. It was as if he simply didn't care his face was black and blue. That perfect face…. Harry snapped his mind back to attention. What was he thinking? Hadn't he already given up on that unattainable dream?

As if sensing his thoughts, Draco stood up and packed his bag. He turned to leave, but something stopped him. Turning once again to face Harry, he took a step towards the bed, causing harry to close his eyes, Draco leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Harrys forehead.

**"Don't die , stupid Potter."** He mumbled into Harry's forehead. With that he turned to leave.

What the heck was that? Harry wondered. Now he was even more confused than ever.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: SO Comment Please ^,^**

**Chapter5**

A few days passed with a few sighs of relief. Harry was eating now sure, not much, but enough to be seen as a good sign. The boy even started taking medicine. The only bad thing was the boy wouldn't talk to anyone, he seem to be in a daze all the time.

Harry was lost in thought almost always the past few days. The brunette was thinking about the gorgeous boy who visited him every night Harry wondered if anyone knew that Draco came here, or did anyone care?

**"I wonder what he's thinking about all the time,"** Hermione wondered softly as she and Ron observed from afar.

**"I don't know. I hope he can go back to normal soon,"** Ron said. He sounded lost; defeated almost. Then the male turned and left only a few minutes until curfew.

When they left, Harry looked around at his fuzzy surroundings. He had no idea where his glasses were. The boy shut his eyes. Another long, boring day and night. Why was he doing this? Why was he trying to stay alive? Just because Draco told him not to die?

Harry opened his eyes after some sleep; it was either extremely late or extremely early in the morning. He didn't know.

Harry heard, and felt, soft hot breath on his right cheek, and he turned, his heat beat rising a hundred fold.

Blonde locks pulled back in a messy low ponytail, and eyes shut, dark bags underneath them. His face was so angelic, so close to his own, right beside his pillowed head. Draco laid leaning on the bed, sleeping on crossed arms with a hand on Harrys.

Harry didn't understand why Draco was here, though he didn't really care. It made his lips crack a small smile, and with his slowly healing bruised hand, he ran it through the soft golden hair that he had a weird obsession for. Why was Draco so sickly looking today? Harry could see because he was close enough to see Draco without his glasses.

**************BREAK**************

Snape walked down the halls. He was heading to his classroom to work on the next batch of potions for the sickly Potter. He decided to make a potion to help make the boy happy or calm to something to get him to talk to them.

The man stopped when he saw a young man he hadn't suspected to see in the all.

**"Can't sleep either Weasley?"** Snape asked, and Ron Jumped, turning to face his potions teacher. He was surprised his least favorite professor wasn't yelling at him.

**"No,"** Ron breathed, leaning back against the wall and looking out the window once more.

**"Want to help me prepare some potions for Potter?"** The teacher asked. He had left Remus sleeping in their bed. He would have felt bad waking him after his long nights without sleep during the full moon.

Ron blinked. Why was Snape being so nice? But he nodded none the less following the man into the classroom.

**************************QUACK****************

Harry felt the heat coming from Draco and he placed a hand to his forehead. Draco had a fever.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:SO Just wrote up chapter 7 hope to get it up soon.**

Chapter6

Draco laid motionless and breathing heavy, on the side of the bed. It was kind of pitiful, that such beauty could succumb to a state like this. Harry had never seen Draco so vulnerable before. It really didn't suit him.

He didn't want to bother him, but when Draco's face screwed up in what looked like acute pain, he had no choice. Left like this Draco's fever could kill him. Harry decide now was a better time than ever to get out of bed.

Harry forced himself slowly to sit up, body aching and stiff. He didn't know if he could get out of the bed. It took some struggling to reach the edge of the bed, and his bare feet touching the cold floor make him shudder.

Only a loose shirt and a pair of baggy boxers hung on the boy's thin frame.

Glancing back at the fallen angel, he pushed himself up only to land hard on his hands knees. It took a long time in his current condition to get up. Once he got to his wobbly legs he made his way out of his separate room. Limping a little, one leg not as healed as the other, he made his way out the door.

Harry didn't have to travel far, for Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey were conversing in the hallway. The woman practically had a conniption when she saw the pale boy leaning against a wall less than an arm distance away.

Harry opened his mouth but nothing came out as the two elders came at him, forcing him back into the medical wing.

Dumbledore carried the boy when he almost fell; a surprise gasp came out of Madam Pomfrey's mouth when Draco was spotted.

"**OhDeary**," rang the woman's voice as she ran over to Harry's fallen angel, who was burning up.

Harry forced his way out of Dumbledore's hold and reached for Draco when the woman went to take him away to a separate room. Dumbledore moved to stop the boy but stopped himself when Harry grabbed the angelic boy's hand. The look in Harry's eyes showed fierceness, he didn't want Draco to leave him.

*********************************BREAK******************************************

Snape rushed down the hall, Ron following his tail. Potions in both males' hands. Severus didn't want Draco to die from a fever that was brought on, from god knows what. No he knew what he had seen Draco sneaking out of the Dining hall and from the Sytherin dorms at night. He had found it odd but then again it made sense right opposites attract just look at himself he was with Remus Lupin one of the boys who tortured him in his younger years.

It didn't take long for Snape and Ron to reach the medical wing. The big doors swinging open letting them in as Madam Pomfrey met them at the door taking the potions ment for Draco and rushing back to the back room. Ron still held a few potions ment for Harry.

Snape gestured for Ron to go check on Harry well where the boy was supposed to be, though that bed was empty. Snape had found Harry only the scene made him blink as Ron came up behind him eyes widened. Harry was lying on Draco's chest clinging to the unconscious male.

Ron felt so many emotions at once he didn't know what to think how to act. What stood out the most was he wanted to hit Draco again even if he was in such a vulnerable state. The angry made his cheeks warm up and his eyes turn into a glare that could kill. Why was harry clinging to the wanker who he thought was the reason he tried to off himself. Why did harry looked so protective of that bastard.

Snape turned in time to stop Ron from rushing into the room and ripping Harry away from Draco who was being made sit up. Harry moved sitting his head in the others lap it made Ron sick to his stomach he felt like he was going to hurl.

"**WHATTHEHELL!"** Ron's voice finally made it out the sounds so harsh so loud that harry flinch he couldn't see Ron per say he was too far away.

**"Weasley,calmdown!"** Snape struggled trying to get the boy out of the room but with the help of Dumbledore they managed to get him all the way to the hall way .

**********************************XPXPXPXPX***************************************

Harry wasn't really fazed by Ron's outburst he hadn't seen it only heard it and guessed what had happened. He assumed Ron had a mental break down and got really angry. His thoughts were mostly on the angel he was clinging to the soft hand one of his own clung to. He's only support in the world it felt like he was walking in a fog all the time. The only light the only thing that felt real was Draco.

The woman gave Draco the potion laying him back down which made harry move from the others lap. Harry rested his head back on the others chest shutting his eyes. His ear right over the others heart listening to the beat slowly become rhythmatic. The heat coming off the other was slowly going away he would be okay wouldn't he?

If Draco didn't pull through harry knew he wouldn't make it he would make sure he succeeded taking his life he wanted to be with Draco forever and in eternity. What started his sick obsession he really wasn't sure it had always been there he supposed hidden inside?

A soft gasp flittered through the room as Hermione stared at the boys.


End file.
